Tuesday, 30 April 2013

Vignette: I think I am getting a baseline…

You know the saying about how when a noise suddenly stops is the first time you can perceive how loud it was?

That.

I have been now on a combination of fluoxetin and voxra/wellbutrin for about 2 months. And I realize thinking back on the recent weeks that I have been feeling… normal. Or at least what I imagine normal might be like.

Gone is the constant work trying to figure out whether there were any subtexts I should have picked up on.
Gone is the constant worry someone, somewhere might not like me and what I do as much as I hope they do.
Gone is the constant conviction that nobody, nowhere, actually likes me particularly much.

I feel now that what I observe is far more in harmony with how I represent it internally. People's emotional states match up better with what I think that they are.

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